The name of the game, or the game of the name...

'What would be my stage name?' A thought that, however unnecessary, has passed through my muddled mind a million and one times. Would I drop my surname? Would I drop my name altogether and create a name not even slightly reminiscent of my own. Stardust, Briony Del Ray, The Gaff Mister? Or maybe not…

Over the years the music industry has made those who can produce a tuneful note, and even those who can not, consider the logistics of their name. Will a stage name result in greater record sales, will it secure that book deal you have been plugging away at, will it make you more popular with the tweens? Or is it merely yet another publicity stunt designed to pull the wool over our eyes and conceal the fact that you can, in fact, NOT sing…

With the intention of seeking the answers to the many questions that occupy my mind, I took, as you do, to google. The source of all knowledge and the foundation of my degree.

Much to your shock and possible disappointment, 50 Cent is not a birth name. 50 Cent, Curtis Jackson as he is known to his inner circle, is merely a stage name, designed to give just the right amount of street cred, and it worked. The same goes for the voice of an angel herself, Charlotte Reed, better known as Charlotte Church - Tony Bennett, Jon Bon Jovi, Bono, David Bowie, Ray Charles, Alice Cooper, Grace Jones, Elton John, Alicia Keys and Marilyn Manson (Bruce Warner doesn't quite scream rockstar to me either).

The stage name is the cloak the magician pulls on, letting people know he means business. But are stage names only for the rich and famous? Take our hotmail accounts for example, boobgurl69, cheekyjk, littlebrizza. We are all trying to be something we are not, boobgurl69 for instance probably has hooters the size of bee stings and understands the numbers 69 as the number at the top of her home address. Games will be played my friend and they will be played well.

Take the California girl herself, Katy Perry, sounds like a name we would come across on the pink glean of a driving license but is it really? For many, Katy Perry is famous for looking like a photoshop of Zooey Deschanel's face with pole dancing pins. But this is not the only famous face for which she may be misconstrued. Before she discovered her love for kissing the lady folk and squirting whipped cream out of customised water pistol bralets, she was known for singing the praises of Jesus Christ under her real name Katy Hudson. For fear of being mistaken as the blonde bombshell, Kate Hudson, taking to a mic in the trivial pursuit of a new career, Katy Perry was born. 

When it comes down to the nitty gritty a stage name isn't a bad idea. With your personal life being attacked so viciously on a day to day basis, why not create a persona that can be shut down at the flick of a metaphorical button. After all the milkman does not ask his friends to refer to him as 'The Milkman', so why should Jon Bon Jovi?